What Defines Love With Valentines Day Coming Up?


Kailee Sabangan

Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more.

With Valentine’s Day coming up, it can really get you thinking about what love really is. These days relationships are way different than they were in the past. There are so many things that aren’t true love these days, but what is love? There is a lot more than just what love is. How do you like someone to express love to you? How do you express love to others? What’s your view on love?

What is Valentine’s Day?
Valentine’s Day is a day where lovers can show their love and affection through greetings and gifts. Valentine’s Day did not come to be celebrated until about the 14th century. It’s a day filled with romance for those in relationships and those who are trying to get into relationships. The traditional gifts to get that lucky person is chocolates, mainly roses as a choice of flowers, and little things like teddy bears.

What is Love?
Love is a feeling of deep romantic attachment to someone. There are many different kinds of love and ways to fall in love. Like love at first sight, right person wrong times, highschool sweethearts, etc. As well as the different ways love can be shown like acts of service, quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation and receiving gifts. There is also old time love and how much love. But it’s not necessarily how you show it, it’s more of that connection you feel with that person.

We often dismiss what the idea of love is now. It is truly going downhill. Sadly people treat others like they are disposable, replaceable, an option or just completely useless. The amount of people who use others these days is absolutely sickening. Back in the day the guys would take girls on dinner dates and meet their parents. Honest communication was key and they were way more compassionate. Some may call it cheesy or corny but that was really the peak of love.

How we love now is very based on technology. People hardly even take time to talk to their significant others. It makes it very easy to ignore or dismiss the ones who are trying to get your attention. And once they finally text back you need to wait sometimes so you don’t look “needy” or “thirsty” because you’re worried how they will see you. But back in the day getting attention from that person was the best thing that could happen to someone. No matter how “obsessed” they looked it wasn’t seen as a bad thing. Our way of asking people out is “come over and chill” or “sneak out so i can see you” instead of being proud of them or wanting to go on actual dates.

Dr. Gary Chapman, a marriage counselor, has created 5 different ways to show affection and love languages. “Words of affirmation” is where you vocalize your love, affection and respect for the other person. Another is “Acts of service,” where you’re doing something for your partner that you know they would like. The main one is physical touch this is where you refer and rely on expressing your love through touch, physical closeness, and other forms of physical connection. Another big one is quality time. This relies on mindfully spending time together in order to show your appreciation & affection for one another. Lastly is receiving gifts; this is when you feel love from all of those small presents that your partner gets you.

Through all of that love is shared and has a huge impact on people’s lives. From gift giving to physical touch to the differences between old and new love, love is still transmitted through you. How do you express your love? And how do you like receiving love?

So this Valentine’s Day don’t be afraid to ask them to be your valentine and show them love how it should be, with compassion and with that strong connection you share.